HP Song Fiction RAWKS
by Lame Llama
Summary: I've decided to just make this my Song Fic thingy. So yeah... sorry about the formats. I suck at HTML
1. Can't Let Go

AN: This is my first attempt at a song fic, so if it sucks... well, thats fine. I didn't expect it to be good. And yes, it is long for a song fic. Think I care?  
  
Oh yeah, the song is Mariah Carey "Can't Let Go". It's a good song. If you haven't heard it, you need to right now. It's old school.  
  
*****************************  
  
Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley had been in love. Thats what it seemed like anyway. It seemed like they'd be together forever. No one expected them to break up. Now, Ron Weasley was in love with someone else, Lavender Brown...  
  
-There you are, Holding her hand. I am lost, Dying to understand-  
  
Hermione watched the couple as they left the common room hand-in-hand, whispering sweet nothings to each other. 'Why did he leave me?' she thought sadly, feeling a fresh wave of confusion and hurt sift it's way through her body. She had no idea why, just Ron one day up and told her "It's over." Her eyes followed them until they finally left completely, and the portrait hole was closed once more.  
  
-Didn't I Cherish you right. Don't you know, You were my life-  
  
"You know, I thought I gave him everything he needed to be happy." she said to Ron's little sister, Ginny, while they were alone. She'd been going through another crying fit, and felt it would be best to talk to someone about it. "I mean... Ginny, he was my entire life. I just wish he knew how bad this was killing me." she said shakily. Ginny shook her head and clicked her tongue, drawing Hermione into a tight embrace. "There, there. He's a stupid git anyway. Just forget about him and move on..."  
  
-Even though I try, I can't let go. Something in your eyes, Captured my soul.- -And every night, I see you in my dreams. You're all I know, I can't let go-  
  
Hermione took this to heart deeply. 'Just let go of him. He's not that special.' she thought to herself repetitively. She went to bed that night, trying her hardest to forget about Ron and the pain he was putting her through. But she couldn't. No, this was her first love. She couldn't just that easy let go of him, and everything that attracted her to him. He always had this admirabilty to him, even if he was slightly annoying at times, and couldn't seem to finish what he started.  
  
That night she had her normal dream ever since they'd broken up. She would be standing in the Entrance Hall, all alone, when Ron would walk up. They'd stare into each others eyes for what seemed like ages, then Ron would apologize and beg for her to take him back. Of course, she always did, and then they'd share a passionate, everlasting kiss. But that dream never came true. It was just that.... a dream.  
  
-Just cast aside, You don't even know I'm alive. You just walk on by, Don't care to see me cry-  
  
Hermione didn't want to let him go, that was the problem. She wanted nothing more than to accept him back, if only he'd want to come back. She'd been thinking this as she headed toward the Great Hall for breakfast that morning. It seemed impossible to let him go now, knowing why she had such a hard time. She didn't want to, and she wouldn't.  
  
Just as this thought streaked by, a red-headed boy began walking towards her. She felt as thought she were floating. Was Ron actually going to come break the good news that he wanted her back? Tears were starting to well in her eyes. This could've been the single happiest moment of her life.  
  
It could've been, had Ron not walked by without even a glance in Hermione's direction. Her jaw quivered. He didn't even realize how happy she was about to be. He hadn't seen all the times she'd cried over him, he hadn't noticed any of it. How could he? Just... how could he?  
  
-And here I am, Still holding on. I can't accept, My world is gone-  
  
That wouldn't get her hopes up though. Hermione Granger was stronger than that. One downfall like this wouldn't make her think the worst. He'd come around eventually, he had too. It was love, he couldn't forget completely.  
  
-Even though I try, I can't let go. Something in your eyes, Captured my soul.- -And every night, I see you in my dreams. You're all I know, I can't let go-  
  
The more she thought about the incident in the Entrance Hall, the more she wanted to break down and cry though. He had just walked past, without a word or even a look. Just as if she were a wall he'd seen a million times before. She headed back to the common room after this. It was unbearable, now that she was dwelling on it. She walked blindly, tears springing to her eyes quickly. This was a nightmare, he had to come back. He had too, she'd die without him.  
  
Once she reached the portrait of the fat lady, she choked out the password and stumbled into the common room, which was basically empty, except for Parvati and Lavender. She swallowed the lump in her throat as she stalker stiffly by them and made her way up the stairs towards her bed, which was all she wanted right now. To lay down and never wake up. Live in her dreams of Ron and her, happy and loving and never leaving.  
  
-Do you even realize, The sorrow I have inside. Everyday of my life, Do you know the way it feels-  
  
Fully clothed, she climbed into her bed and hid under the covers. For a few moments, she sat there silently, dwelling hopelessly and reminscing. Then, as if she had been holding it in the whole time, she burst into tears. She sobbed until she had no more tears to cry, until her head throbbed painfully beneath the dark of her covers.  
  
-When all you have just dies, I try and try, To deny that I need you. But still you remain on my mind-  
  
Her insides churned uncomfortably. She couldn't deal with this sort of pain, this sort of torment over a guy. There would be tons of other fish in the sea she tried telling herself. Just because one jumped back into the water, doesn't mean they all will. It didn't shove him out of her mind, it only made her more depressed. She cried dry tears, it was like a wretched screaming muffled by the hand of sorrow.  
  
"WHY?!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. "WHY ME?!"  
  
-Even though I try, I can't let go. Something in your eyes, Captured my soul.- -And every night, I see you in my dreams. You're all I know, I can't let go-  
  
Once she finally emerged from the throngs of the empty dorm, Lavender and Parvati stared at her. She must've looked a mess, writhing hopelessly underneath the covers of her bed. At this point, she wanted nothing more than to go back to her home. The prospect of facing Ron for the remainder of this year and plus the next seemed worse than being tortured with The Crucatius Curse.  
  
-No I just can't get you out of my mind, I never can say goodbye. 'Cause every night, I see you in my dreams-  
  
She wandered the halls aimlessly after this little episode. Her classes, books... nothing seemed to fit into her life at that moment in time. Daydreams flitted by her eyes, memories of past expierences, it seemed like she was seeing her very life before her eyes. And for a while, she noticed, her life was grand. Now she seemed like a train wreck.  
  
-You're all I know, I can't let you go. Even though I try, I can't let go of something that I need so badly-  
  
Hermione hadn't been watching where she was going, and found herself walking smack dab into Ron. "Oi, watch where your go...ing..." he had started fiercely, then spun around and trailed off when he saw Hermione. It was the most awkward predicament she'd ever been in, and she was sure it was the same for him by the mixed look of pain and confusion upon his face. She gulped back a fresh flood of tears and gave him a weak smile before he nodded once and walked away.  
  
She inhaled deeply, sniffing quickly to make the tickling feeling in her nose go away. This was terrible. This was worse than terrible. This was...  
  
She turned to watch the back of Ron's head walk away, and she gulped as she murmured.  
  
"You're all I know... I can't let go." 


	2. Someday

*How the hell did we wind up like this Why weren't we able To see the signs that we missed And try to turn the tables*  
  
Hermione sat upon the unmade bed of our home, sitting next to her packed suitcase; which was closed as if she were finished. Her fists were balled up like she was ready to swing at someone, and I knew her target was me. She sniffled softly, covering her face as she sobbed. I sat in front of her, not being able to help my eyes as they watched her weeping form. This relationship had somehow turned to crap. I felt guilty for it, even though I KNEW it wasn't completely my fault. We were just changing into different people. Thats what I had tried convincing myself. Needless to say, that didn't work. "Draco..." she mumbled, wiping her eyes. I stared at the floor, not being able to meet her eyes. "Hermione..."  
  
She stopped, sighed and put her face in her hands once more. I shook my head. "What happened with us Hermione? Where... where did it go wrong?"  
  
Hermione's big chocolate brown eyes looked into my own. "I wish I knew."  
  
"At least then we might have been able to fix it!"  
  
She merely shrugged in reply.  
  
*I wish you'd unclench your fists And unpack your suitcase Lately there's been too much of this Dont think its too late*  
  
It seemed as if everyday had been this way after we'd moved in together. Sure, at first it seemed like completely bliss. But then for some reason we always got on each others nerves. Always.  
  
"Hermione, can't you just unpack? So I know I at least have a chance to talk this over with you?"  
  
She shook her head definatly, taking her hands from her face and clenching her fists once more. I sighed. "Please don't do that."  
  
"Do what?" she asked as she stood.  
  
"Ball up your fists like you're going to punch me or something. We won't be able to work this out if I feel you're to be violent about it."  
  
"It's too late to work this out Draco. It's way too late."  
  
I shook my head, standing slowly and taking her shoulders. She tried to shrug me off, but she knew already I was too strong for that. "Is that what you really think?" I asked. I observed her expression slowly, watching as her mind took into consideration my words. She finally nodded, exhaling deeply. I shook my head again, closing my eyes. "Don't think that. It's never too late."  
  
*Nothin's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will*  
  
"No, Draco. It won't happen! Everythings just gone terribly wrong in this thing. We can't do this anymore, we just can't."  
  
"Will you have faith in me!? It seems bad right now, but who is to say it won't get better with some time?"  
  
She looked at the floor and shook her head, gulping. "Fate."  
  
I looked over her face and sighed. "You're right. As always." I sat down and stared at the floor. "It won't work right now. Not... not at this moment in our lives. But you can't say it'll never happen!"  
  
"Thats what my heart is telling me."  
  
"No, thats what your mind is telling you. Admit it, your heart isn't saying it won't happen."  
  
*Someday, somehow gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when (You're the only one who knows that) Someday, somehow gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when*  
  
She sighed, sitting down on the bed once more and caressing her suitcase. "Now you're the one whos right. But Draco, if we split... I mean, how long are we going to be not together?"  
  
I shrugged. "Hermione, thats your desicion. I'm willing to work this thing out right now... but I'll back off if thats what you'd like."  
  
She simply nodded in reply.  
  
*Well I hoped that since we're here anyway We could end up saying Things we've always needed to say So we could end up stringing*  
  
"Hermione..."  
  
She stared at me. "Yes?"  
  
"Do you have anything you'd like to say to me? Anything at all. Since we're splitting I suppose this would be a ripe opportunity for a say anything..." I wanted to take back the words, but I wanted to say things to her... I just wanted her to be frank with me first. She inhaled deeply, puffing out her cheeks as she exhaled. "I do." she started. "I've wanted to tell you that... that when I'd be here, all alone, and you'd be out? I wanted to beat you to a pulp whenever you got in. I always thought you were with someone else, I guess it always branched off that indicent with Lavender..."  
  
I wanted to explode, but I kept my calm. After all, she was saying what was on her mind, even if we HAD worked through the Lavender thing already. I stared hard at her, waiting for her to continue.  
  
"Also." she continued. "Whenever you'd be extremely sarcastic with me... saying things that were said just to be negative, I thought you were merely using me for some reason. I dont know why... it was a silly thought..."  
  
Indeed it was. I was in love with this girl, why would I use her?  
  
"And I had a moment where I was entirely unsure of how much I actually loved you."  
  
I gaped. "Did you want to say anything to me?" she said after a silent moment. I shook my head, gulping.  
  
*Now the story's played out like this Just like a paperback novel Lets rewrite an ending that fits Instead of a hollywood horror*  
  
The way this whole thing was going reminded me strangely of some Muggle romance novel. Where the woman loved the man, but wasn't sure if she was in love with him, and his only reaction was to stare at her. Thats exactly how this event was played out. I didn't want it to end on these terms. I didn't like the fact that I felt like a character from some sappy love story. (AN: Isn't THAT amusing?!?) I stood quickly, as I found her standing. "Hermione, this is just like one of those Muggle Novels you've grown so fond of! Don't let our ending be like theres! Let ours be... be... real."  
  
I'll admit, I was never one for expressing a serious emotion. She knew this, and nodded. "But it's... this is real. This is reality."  
  
"It's more like a horror book!"  
  
"Its how our destiny is to be."  
  
"Oh, don't give me that..."  
  
*Nothin's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will*  
  
Hermione shook her head, cupping my face with her delicate hands. "Draco, I want you to trust me on this. I know I've confused you but... just let our hearts be our guide. If I come back darling, I'm yours forever."  
  
"IF you come back?! Why would you say it like that?"  
  
"Because that could be the way the cookie crumbles!"  
  
At that point I wished she'd have left, and come back... just so I knew I'd have a chance in hell.  
  
*Someday, somehow Gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when (You're the only one who knows that) Someday, somehow gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when*  
  
"Trust me Draco. It'll happen one day."  
  
I watched her grab up her suitcase and walk out of the room, and heard her footsteps all the way down the stairs. Only then did I walk after her. She opened the door carefully and stood in the doorway, then looked back at me. I felt my heart do a back flip inside my rib cage. Maybe she was changing her mind...  
  
*How the hell did we wind up like this Why weren't we able To see the signs that we missed And try to turn the tables Now the story's played out like this Just like a paperback novel Lets rewrite an ending that fits Instead of a hollywood horror*  
  
I watched her stand there, staring at the metal frame beneath her feet. She looked comtemplative, and my hopes were rising sky high as I stared at her.  
  
She finally looked at me, and I could see a fresh tear drop sliding down ehr cheek. "I really wish I knew what went wrong... at least then we'd have been able to tackle it from the start."  
  
She turned on her heel, facing her back to me and heaved a deep sigh. Then she took her first footstep out of the house with her luggage in one hand. My jaw dropped, and I walked to the door to watch her leave.  
  
*Nothin's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will*  
  
My heart was in my throat as I ran toward her. She wasn't walking very fast, and it seemed like she didn't know where she was going anyway. I took her arm softly and turned her to face me. Tears were streaming down her face. "I'm not going to stay Draco. I'm not." she choked out, gulping. I shrugged my shoulders slowly. "I'm not expecting you too. But can't we share one last kiss?"  
  
She stood stalk still, and I took it as my opportunity to gently kiss her lips. She kissed me back, and it seemed like such a natural thing. I nearly expected her to drop her suitcase and throw herself into my arms. But the short lived hope bubbling inside me faltered when she pulled away.  
  
"Remember I love you Draco."  
  
*Someday, somehow gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when (You're the only one who knows that) Someday, somehow gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when (You're the only one who knows that) I know you're wondering when (You're the only one who knows that) I know you're wondering when*  
  
I watched as she turned on her heel and walked away from me. My last glimmer of hope vanished completely as her tiny form became even smaller, and I felt my heart break in two when she'd vanished completely.  
  
I knew that someday... somehow we were going to make it. Just not at that moment. But my mind wouldn't let me stop wondering when. But I remembered she loved me, those were her last words to me after all. She was the only one who could release the pain I was feeling in my chest, she was the only one who knew when it would stop. I blew a kiss into the wind and turned on my heel, walking back toward the house silently. 


End file.
